Recently, I found out that Apple has finally acknowledged the fact that a lot of the iPhone 5 models they manufactured have defects. This news happened just two months after I went in to an Apple store to see if they would do anything about the sleep/wake button problem I have been having.
Of course, to true Apple fashion, they only are acknowledging that the sleep/wake button is defective. My volume down button is also defective, and I also have dust under the front and rear facing cameras. Clearly problems due to parts or manufacturing, as there are no ends to the complaints found online for the same problems.
Instead of issuing a recall, they are calling it the “iPhone 5 Sleep/Wake Button Replacement Program.” On that web page, you can submit your phone’s serial number to see if it qualifies for the fix. If you do, you then have to make an appointment at the “Genius Bar” or mail it in for service. If you go into a store, they have 16GB iPhone 5 loaner phones that you can borrow.
If you’re lucky enough to still be under warranty, or paid for the Apple Care nonsense, you should be able to get a new replacement phone on the spot for all the aforementioned problems. I’m one of those that have a phone that is out of warranty, so I don’t have many options as the guys at Apple won’t fix the camera issues and say that the only option is to replace the phone.
Anyways, I made a same day appointment to go into the store to get this Sleep/Wake button nonsense fixed. I figure while I’m at it I could ask again about the volume button and camera issues and see how much it would cost to get fixed.
That leads me to the first annoying thing that happened. While waiting at the so-called Genius Bar, I happen to choose to stand as I had Alyssa with me and it probably wouldn’t be considered good parenting if I popped a squat on the stool and just let her languish in the stroller or roam unsupervised. While waiting for my turn patiently, some yuppie Apple employee comes by and asks me if he could take the seat for a customer.
What the fuck do you think I am? You think I like standing around in a crowded Apple store with a bunch of retards that don’t know anything about computers and buy into the hype of Apple? Without even waiting for an answer from me, he grabs the stool and walks away. Arghh!
Just then, the Genius Bar employee approaches me to ask how he can help. I told him I was there for the replacement program and the other issues I was having. He said that he might have a fix for the volume button, but the camera issues were not fixable. I’d either have to get a replacement or just upgrade my phone. He mumbled something about checking with someone else and walked away.
When he came back, he told me that they couldn’t fix the volume button for some reason that he mumbled and that I couldn’t understand. I was getting sick of the politician-like non-answers so I decided that I would just send my phone in to get repaired and that would be it. So of course, I get ushered into another line where I have to wait for help again.
I had already backed up my phone and turned off Find My Iphone, so I was all set. I was given a document to sign regarding the loaner phone and then waited for them to wipe and restore my phone that was going in for service. I noticed that the 2nd condition of the loaner phone was actually quite liberal. It basically says that if you don’t return the loaner phone withing two weeks of being notified that your phone is ready for pickup, the phone you left with them belongs to them and the loaner phone now belongs to you. It’s basically a swap. The mice began to turn the wheels in my head with that one.
When they were finally done doing whatever they were doing, the guy brought over an iPad for me to sign some more legal stuff. I don’t sign things that I don’t read. More importantly, I don’t like being rushed while I read it. This guy took it upon himself to accept something that I didn’t even get to look at and rushed me to sign something written in a size four font. Fuck!
After that nonsense, he hands over a loaner phone and says OK. OK what? OK asshole? OK get the fuck out?
After getting acceptable answers as to when and how I’ll get notified that my phone is ready, I take my now restless and hungry child out of the store and back to the car to head home. When I got to the car, I was able to inspect the loaner phone a little bit further. No dust under the camera lenses, but there many cosmetic scratches around the surface. Looks like I won’t be holding on to this phone.
I think when I get my original phone back I’ll just see how much it costs for an independent repair guy to fix the issues I’m having. If not, I might have to live with the other issues for longer or start shopping for a new phone. Either way, I’m pretty much done with Apple. All this so called innovation, and this and that, is all hype wrapped up in clever marketing. I’m tired of the product cycle, the lemmings that tout false facts like, “Macs don’t get viruses,” and the premium for shitty gear.